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    if you'd have sex with me tonight I'd be perfectly fine with you telling everyone it was just an April Fool's joke.

    if you'd have sex with me tonight I'd be perfectly fine with you telling everyone it was just an April Fool's joke

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    To avoid confusion, I'm waiting until tomorrow to tell you I'm pregnant.

    To avoid confusion, I'm waiting until tomorrow to tell you I'm pregnant

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    May changing your Facebook relationship status as an April Fool's joke not cause the end of your relationship.

    May changing your Facebook relationship status as an April Fool's joke not cause the end of your relationship

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    I really wish I didn't have to remind you that staging a murder is not an appropriate April Fool's Day prank.

    I really wish I didn't have to remind you that staging a murder is not an appropriate April Fool's Day prank

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    Let's make sure our harmless prank doesn't cause long-term psychological damage to scores of innocent civilians.

    Let's make sure our harmless prank doesn't cause long-term psychological damage to scores of innocent civilians

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    My dream for April Fool's Day is to discover your obsession with a seemingly endless series of college basketball games isn't actually real.

    My dream for April Fool's Day is to discover your obsession with a seemingly endless series of college basketball games isn't actually real

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    Not to alarm you, but I was hoping you could help me procure a flame retardant jumpsuit for April Fool's.

    Not to alarm you, but I was hoping you could help me procure a flame retardant jumpsuit for April Fool's

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    I intend to abuse your kind, trusting nature for the sake of my own moderate, short-lived amusement.

    I intend to abuse your kind, trusting nature for the sake of my own moderate, short-lived amusement

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    I trust you not to pull any April Fool's Day pranks because I trust you'll still think it's March.

    I trust you not to pull any April Fool's Day pranks because I trust you'll still think it's March

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    Let's use April Fool's as a cover for numerous sexual harassment violations.

    Let's use April Fool's as a cover for numerous sexual harassment violations

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    Sorry no one understood you were making an April Fool's joke because no one thinks you have a sense of humor.

    Sorry no one understood you were making an April Fool's joke because no one thinks you have a sense of humor

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    Sorry I mistook your announcement of a ghastly personal tragedy for an April Fool's joke.

    Sorry I mistook your announcement of a ghastly personal tragedy for an April Fool's joke

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    I'm comfortable with any April Fool's Day hoax outside of a multi-billion dollar Ponzi scheme.

    I'm comfortable with any April Fool's Day hoax outside of a multi-billion dollar Ponzi scheme

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    This is the one day of the year I wish I was on jury duty.

    This is the one day of the year I wish I was on jury duty

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    Nothing you pull on me this April Fool's Day could be worse than anything that's already happened to me this year.

    Nothing you pull on me this April Fool's Day could be worse than anything that's already happened to me this year.

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    Congratulations on effectively deceiving and humiliating me.

    Congratulations on effectively deceiving and humiliating me

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    I can't wait to find out if the New York Times paywall is an April Fool's joke.

    I can't wait to find out if the New York Times paywall is an April Fool's joke

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    Being unemployed affords me plenty of time to devise treacherous April Fool's pranks on the people who made me unemployed.

    Being unemployed affords me plenty of time to devise treacherous April Fool's pranks on the people who made me unemployed

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    Sorry your unhealthy lifestyle makes cardiac arrest a feasible outcome from an April Fool's joke.

    Sorry your unhealthy lifestyle makes cardiac arrest a feasible outcome from an April Fool's joke

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    Just a warning that on April Fool's Day my natural distrust of others will be ratcheted up to a level bordering on psychosis.

    Just a warning that on April Fool's Day my natural distrust of others will be ratcheted up to a level bordering on psychosis

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