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    If you were a pimp, I'd be your most loyal and productive prostitute.

    If you were a pimp, I'd be your most loyal and productive prostitute

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    Remember to celebrate Boss's Day today so you don't have to do anything this weekend for that asshole.

    Remember to celebrate Boss's Day today so you don't have to do anything this weekend for that asshole

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    Out of respect for George Steinbrenner, I'd be honored if you'd fire and rehire me today.

    Out of respect for George Steinbrenner, I'd be honored if you'd fire and rehire me today

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    Happy Boss's day to the person who will likely be rewarded for all my hard work.

    Happy Boss's day to the person who will likely be rewarded for all my hard work.

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    This Boss's Day, I would like to say thank you for the job that gives me health insurance that covers my anxiety medication that I need to take because of this job.

    This Boss's Day, I would like to say thank you for the job that gives me health insurance that covers my anxiety medication that I need to take because of this job.

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    Happy Boss's Day to the person whose job I never, ever, ever, ever want.

    Happy Boss's Day to the person whose job I never, ever, ever, ever want.

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