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Watching a gorgeous vampire and buff werewolf battle for a girl's love is the perfect distraction from my inability to meet a semi-datable human
Let's pretend there's nothing alarming about a tween fantasy movie causing cougars to fantasize about statutory rape
I wonder if Twilight's abstinence message will suppress my herculean urge to screw Robert Pattinson
Twilight showed me it's okay to date underage girls if you're a 107-year-old vampire
There's a fine line between liking bromance movies and wanting to spend the rest of your life in the arms of Paul Rudd
I hope that Mickey Rourke wins the Oscar and that I'm not the person who has to present it to him
It must be difficult to root for the kid in Slumdog Millionaire if you're a recent millionaire now living in a slum
Let's honor Kate Winslet's breakthrough year for women by discussing the nuances of her weight fluctuation
I won't read anything into your not yet responding to my invitation to see He's Just Not That Into You
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