


I'm like Don Draper on Mad Men minus the looks, charm, style, talent, and sex life

It's crucial that the produce I buy and eventually discard comes from the local farmer's market

Someecards.com is the greatest thing that's ever happened to me

I want to marry someone Jewish for reasons I can no longer recall

I'm concerned my workouts have become tailored more to not dying than to getting laid

Spending a day on Facebook has once again fooled me into believing I have an actual social life

My high school yearbook quote contained lyrics from a classic rock band

My decreasing libido is dovetailing nicely with my increasingly disgusting appearance