Shaquille O'Neal has posted the definitive response to Miley Cyrus on Instagram.
Under normal circumstances, I'd assume Mr. O'Neal is just suffering from altitude sickness.
We're going to politely assume that Shaq is reacting to the media circus around Miley Cyrus, and not the young woman's body per se, because that would be kinda messed up. Of course, Shaq is a mysterious artist who doesn't make it easy for onlookers to interpret his performances. Indeed, who can truly say they understand Kazaam or his rap career? Perhaps when alien archaeologists uncover this Instagram video, they will finally have the distance necessary to appreciate his wry satire alongside such greats as Jonathan Swift and the Roman writer Juvenal. Perhaps.
(by Johnny McNulty)