Monday night on Jimmy Kimmel Live, after embarrassing the living hell out of Pink, Johnny Depp and his 37 skull rings talked about DogGate (yes, again), the scandal in which he and his dangerous criminal wife Amber Heard smuggled their Yorkshire Terriers, Pistol and Boo, into Australia (which sounds like the least interesting Ocean's Eleven imaginable).

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After apologizing for kissing Jimmy Kimmel repeatedly on the mouth, Kimmel brought up Depp's recent apology to the Australian government. As part of their punishment, Depp and Heard made the now infamous "apology video" which has been parodied countless times. When asked by Kimmel if he'd watched the strangely somber apology after making it, Depp said, "No, because I didn't want to kill myself."

Depp and Heard apologized for sneaking dangerous teacup dogs… into Australia.

Barnaby Joyce, the Australian agriculture minister, had threatened to euthanize the dogs if they weren't removed from the country immediately. On Kimmel, Depp called Joyce "Barnaby Jones" and then remarked that he thinks Joyce "looks somehow like inbred with a tomato."

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