It's not you, Netflix, it's who I am when I'm around you.
When your relationship with Netflix began, everything was new and exciting. It was all you could talk about for weeks. You stopped going out with your old friends to spend nights and weekends together in front of the TV. Every recommendation sounded like fun. Nature documentaries? Sign me up. Foreign movies? Oui oui! You could sit for hours reminiscing about sitcoms you loved as a kid and binging on dramas the old you would've never dreamed of watching. Pretty soon you were contemplating a future together filled with nothing but laughter and love.
But like any relationship, you fell into the old patterns and the excitement began to wear off. Then one night you find yourself sitting on the couch in silence, staring at a bunch of crap you're never going to watch and wondering where it all went wrong. Your Netflix cue had become a mess.
Well it's time to clean it up with this 5-step guide.
1. The Important Documentary
You felt so good putting this in your queue. You and the voice of Ellen Page were going to face life's problems head-on and change the world. Only you never seemed to be in the mood to do it. It's not that you don't want to help, the movie just seems like a drag. And the last time you tried to help a bee you were ten and the bee was a total dick who stung you for your effort. Want to help bees? Buy a jar of honey.