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    Let's pit our children against each other.

    Let's pit our children against each other

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    Make yourself useful.

    Make yourself useful

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    My parents will be here soon.

    My parents will be here soon

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    Grandpop, let's get to know each other better before you get Alzheimer's.

    Grandpop, let's get to know each other better before you get Alzheimer's

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    Dad, you've always been like a father to me.

    Dad, you've always been like a father to me

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    Dad, it's still hard to believe you're someone's father.

    Dad, it's still hard to believe you're someone's father

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    Let's grow something beautiful on top of your dead pet.

    Let's grow something beautiful on top of your dead pet

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    I can't wait to nap through 85% of my visit home.

    I can't wait to nap through 85% of my visit home

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