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    Happy Father's Day to a grandfather I hope to fool into believing I've visited since last Father's Day.

    Happy Father's Day to a grandfather I hope to fool into believing I've visited since last Father's Day

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    Don't let the fact that Obama became president without having a father in his life make you feel unimportant this Father's Day.

    Don't let the fact that Obama became president without having a father in his life make you feel unimportant this Father's Day

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    Dad, thanks for dating someone older than me during your mid-life crisis.

    Dad, thanks for dating someone older than me during your mid-life crisis

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    I hope this blue-tinted Father's Day card helps make up for the fact that I wasn't a boy.

    I hope this blue-tinted Father's Day card helps make up for the fact that I wasn't a boy

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    Dad, this Father's Day you get fifteen uninterrupted minutes to gloat about the downfall of a very liberal congressman.

    Dad, this Father's Day you get fifteen uninterrupted minutes to gloat about the downfall of a very liberal congressman

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    Happy Father's Day in advance to someone who may be mature enough to have children by age 62.

    Happy Father's Day in advance to someone who may be mature enough to have children by age 62

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    Dad, thanks for giving me my first beer and paying for my first rehab.

    Dad, thanks for giving me my first beer and paying for my first rehab

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    Dad, I'll always appreciate you sticking around after mom got fat.

    Dad, I'll always appreciate you sticking around after mom got fat

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