This Friendship Day, I promise to focus mostly on your good qualities when talking behind your back
Friendship Day is the perfect time to thank you for lending me money and to see if I can borrow more
On Friendship Day, the realization of who I'm friends with is almost too much to bear
This Friendship Day, let's pause to remember how empty our lives would be without alcohol
This Friendship Day, let's inject some extra venom into our shit talking
I simply cannot imagine a way to celebrate Friendship Day that my friends won't think is gay
Let's protest Friendship Day by having hot, friendship-ending sex
Let's protest Friendship Day by having hot, friendship-ending sex
Happy Friendship Day to a best friend who single-handedly raises my family's suspicions about my sexual orientation
Friendship Day is the perfect time to thank you for lending me money and to see if I can borrow more
Friendship Day is the perfect time to not reflect on the friends I've methodically erased from my life
I'd like to use Friendship Day to reassure you that you're not the one member of our group no one likes