•  

    I'd like to apply for a refund on my college education.

    I'd like to apply for a refund on my college education

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    I always knew you'd barely graduate.

    I always knew you'd barely graduate

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    Congratulations on getting through the easiest part of life.

    Congratulations on getting through the easiest part of life

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    Your GPA will open many doors for you.

    Your GPA will open many doors for you

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    You have our complete non-financial support.

    You have our complete non-financial support

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    You just wasted up to $200,000.

    You just wasted up to $200,000

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    Good luck finding shameful entry-level employment.

    Good luck finding shameful entry-level employment

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    Your resume sucks.

    Your resume sucks

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