I hear you're going as the total dickbag who doesn't dress up
I'm certain your intoxication alone will sufficiently scare others
If the economy doesn't improve, we may need to commit real crimes this Mischief Night
Sorry your Halloween costume is going to be much more cumbersome and uncomfortable than you expected
Be sure to hang onto your hobo costume after Halloween in case the financial bailout doesn't work
Let's celebrate the one night a year our white suburban neighborhood can pose as "scary"
I'm honoring the memory of Heath Ledger with a 15-dollar Joker mask from Walmart
I assume you're going as a vampire since I haven't seen you in daylight for months
Let's decorate our home like the haunted house it will resemble after the foreclosure
I hope Wiccans don't cast a spell on me for my stereotypical caricature of a wicked witch
Best of luck choosing a costume that's not too clever for anyone to understand
