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Let's ignore Avatar's environmental message by wearing a plastic, non-biodegradable Na'vi costume one time before throwing it away

If you want to visit a real graveyard this Halloween, just log back in to Google Plus

Let's get high on fructose

May the 32 dudes at your Halloween sausage fest be misconstrued as part of your Chilean miner costume

Your costume sounds annoyingly similar to mine

I'm dressing up this Halloween as the ghost of Rick Perry's presidential run.

I'm dressing as Justin Bieber this Halloween in the hopes of being legally statutorily raped

My favorite part of Halloween this year is that Sarah Palin isn't topical enough to be a costume

Just double-checking that your Obama costume will involve a mask and not shoe polish

Drunkenly failing at your job makes you the perfect candidate for a Red Sox costume this Halloween

Sorry in advance for egging your home if you put anything remotely healthy in my trick-or-treat bag

Instead of candy this Halloween, I'm passing out all the canned goods I bought for Raptures that never happened

I'll dress like a vampire if you'll drink enough to make me look anything like anyone from Twilight, True Blood, or any of that other crap you watch

Your inability to communicate on the phone will be an asset to your Tony La Russa Halloween costume

Fake spider webs are a great way to distract people from your real bedbugs

If your Halloween costume makes no sense whatsoever I'll just assume you're dressed as Inception

No Halloween costume could ever creep me out as much as your regular attire.

This Halloween, I'm spending $150,000 to dress as someone pretending to be remotely sane enough to one day run the United States.

I'm sorry your bed bug costume got infested by bed bugs.

You strike me as one of those people who hands out fruit on Halloween.

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