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  • Feb. 20th, 2009

    This year for Lent I'm giving up.

    This year for Lent I'm giving up.

  • Feb. 22nd, 2012

    Your Facebook friends are praying for you to give up Facebook for Lent.

    Your Facebook friends are praying for you to give up Facebook for Lent.

  • Mar. 3rd, 2011

    I'm going to give up TV for Lent except for all the programming I recorded before Lent.

    I'm going to give up TV for Lent except for all the programming I recorded before Lent.

  • Mar. 7th, 2011

    Let's hope this Lent we're able to give up freezing our asses off for 40 days.

    Let's hope this Lent we're able to give up freezing our asses off for 40 days.

  • Mar. 1st, 2008

    Lent is when I determine which addictions I may still have some control over.

    Lent is when I determine which addictions I may still have some control over.

  • Mar. 7th, 2011

    I'm giving up drinking for Lent and giving up Lent for St. Patrick's Day.

    I'm giving up drinking for Lent and giving up Lent for St. Patrick's Day.

  • Feb. 21st, 2012

    Please give up Jeremy Lin puns for Lent.

    Please give up Jeremy Lin puns for Lent.

  • Mar. 8th, 2011

    I wish my coworkers would give up talking to me for Lent.

    I wish my coworkers would give up talking to me for Lent.

  • Mar. 1st, 2008

    Congratulations on Jesus denying Satan's request to make bread out of stone.

    Congratulations on Jesus denying Satan's request to make bread out of stone.

  • Feb. 19th, 2009

    I'd consider following Christ if he was on Twitter.

    I'd consider following Christ if he was on Twitter.

  • Mar. 1st, 2008

    Lent is my favorite time of year to not be Christian.

    Lent is my favorite time of year to not be Christian.

  • Feb. 19th, 2009

    You may as well wait 40 more days to call me because I'm giving up flaky guys for Lent.

    You may as well wait 40 more days to call me because I'm giving up flaky guys for Lent.

  • Feb. 24th, 2009

    Though neither of us has entered a church in years, I propose we leave work to spend six minutes getting ashes on our foreheads and 2 1/2 hours eating lunch.

    Though neither of us has entered a church in years, I propose we leave work to spend six minutes getting ashes on our foreheads and 2 1/2 hours eating lunch.

  • Feb. 19th, 2009

    This Ash Wednesday, best wishes on proving you love Jesus more than you love not looking ridiculous in front of your peers.

    This Ash Wednesday, best wishes on proving you love Jesus more than you love not looking ridiculous in front of your peers.

  • Mar. 1st, 2011

    I'm giving up Charlie Sheen for Lent.

    I'm giving up Charlie Sheen for Lent.

  • Feb. 23rd, 2009

    I'm giving up Internet porn for Lent so I'll be needing a lot more actual sex.

    I'm giving up Internet porn for Lent so I'll be needing a lot more actual sex.

  • Mar. 1st, 2008

    I'm giving up being a self-hating Jew for Lent.

    I'm giving up being a self-hating Jew for Lent.

  • Feb. 23rd, 2009

    This Lent, I'm giving up fantasizing about all the things I was going to buy with the Christmas bonus I never got.

    This Lent, I'm giving up fantasizing about all the things I was going to buy with the Christmas bonus I never got.

  • Mar. 1st, 2008

    I've begun my 40-day celebration of no longer being religious.

    I've begun my 40-day celebration of no longer being religious.

  • Feb. 24th, 2009

    I hope your Ash Wednesday isn't ruined by being reminded you're going to die.

    I hope your Ash Wednesday isn't ruined by being reminded you're going to die.

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