RULE #10: Learn that scars are cool, and that your bully is helping you get cooler. (via Jezebel)

The Lincoln Public Schools system is cowering in a corner and apologizing today after an onslaught of outrage from parents who were rightly ticked off about a ludicrous anti-bullying flier that basically recommends closing your eyes and going to a happy place (don't get me wrong: going to a happy place is usually a great idea). The fliers were sent home with fifth graders from Zeman Elementary in Lincoln, Nebraska to be shown to their parents.

Let's be honest, these two news anchors terrorized some dweebs in their day.

Every single detail of it is better—and by better I mean worse—than the last. The objective of the flier is to make kids better at "turning bullies into buddies." What follows reads like any abuser's personal wishlist of victim traits.

1. Refuse to get mad. "Anger is a feeling we have toward our enemies, not our buddies." "...if a bully finds out he/she can get you angry, you become their puppet..."

2. Treat the person who is being mean as if they are trying to help you. "No matter how insulting or mean they may sound, be grateful and think they really care about you." Hey dork, at least the cool kids are paying attention to you!

Sources: Jezebel | 10 11 Now