Remember all the garbage you shoveled together in an attempt to turn in a research paper? Well someone has to read those piles of hot sewer refuse, and those people are our teachers! They read every word, and after years of teaching, they shared on Reddit 13 of the worst of the worst, best, funniest, most offensive bits writing they've ever had to mark up with red pens.


1. lacks-direction was forced to read about one student's preoccupation with "chubbies."

I once had a student who said the biggest issue facing obese (male) children is that they have small penises. Not ONE of the issues, but the BIGGEST issue. I suppose the risk of diabetes, heart disease, and the potential for issues with confidence and bullying pale in comparison to small genitalia in pre-pubescent males.

2. RPShep was one professor not impressed by the latest edition of Rolling Stone.

Writing Professor here.

I had a student who was doing pretty poorly in my class. He just wasn't showing up and wasn't doing the work. I asked him to come to my office one day and told him that it wasn't mathematically possible to pass the class anymore. He said okay but that he wanted to stay in the class so he'd be better next time I around. I said that was fine, and he showed up for the next couple classes.

For the final paper, I was having them analyze a pop culture text: basically, they had to break down and explain a movie, an album, a TV show, or something like that. This student handed me in an album review cut and pasted directly from Rolling Stone's website. Not a single word was even changed. So I asked him to come to my office again after class. I told him that not only did I find the original article that this was plagiarized from, but it also would have failed even if I hadn't (because it had nothing to do with the assignment). I told him that now his F was an XF (failure for academic dishonesty). He started crying and told me he was "just trying to impress me."