Feel like you're spending summer chained to your desk? At this place, the chains might be real.

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Negotiating for time off in the summertime can be tough. Everyone's competing to leave the office on the same days, there aren't many vacation days to use, and there is still so much left in the inbox. Whoever works at this place definitely have a harder time getting away from their desks than the rest of us.

Here's a full transcript of the letter:

THE EMPLOYEE VACATION POLICY HAS CHANGED!!!!
Please read a summary of the changes before requesting any days off.
EMPLOYEES EARN 12 VACATION HOURS PER YEAR.
Every calendar year, you are given 12 hours of paid leave. Feel free to spend these hours as you see fit. Unused hours will not carry over into the next calendar year. Paid leave hours are applied whenever you are out of the office for non-work-related activities, like lunches, doctor's appointments, or maternity leave.
TIME AWAY REQUESTS MUST BE SENT TO THE SCHEDULING DEPARTMENT.
You must submit your requests for specific hours away from work no sooner than 6 months before any intended time away. A request for any time away made after that 6 months will be considered a “LAST MINUTE REQUEST" and be automatically denied. Employees will no longer be terminated for last minute requests, but pay and/or benefits will be impacted. Employees may not have overlapping vacation time under any circumstances. We don't want a repeat of the “HURRICANE" fiasco.
SICK LEAVE CANNOT BE USED FOR TIME AWAY.
If you do not have enough paid vacation time available, you cannot supplement your request using your sick leave hours. Sick leave has been abolished due to the few employees who abused the system last year by contracting tuberculosis.
VACATION PAY MUST BE REQUESTED FROM PAYROLL DIRECTLY.
In order to receive your unearned pay for unworked hours, you must provide Payroll with proof of your vacation activities. This is to cut back on employees taking “mental health days." We find it offensive and irresponsible that employees would equate not being productive to some sort of rejuvenating mental therapy.
EMPLOYEES MUST FINISH ALL WORK BEFORE TAKING VACATION HOURS.
This includes any projects that are conceived and assigned while employees are scheduled to be out of the office. Not being in the office will not be an acceptable reason to miss work assignments. This is why we invested in e-mail addresses for the staff. Deadlines cannot be extended or differed. Your designated “workplace morale companion" will be required to send all work materials to you.
Office hours are also changing for summer!
Full time employees are now required to work 6:30am-8:30pm plus any allotted detention hours.
Happy Summer!
MANAGEMENT
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