16 people share the 'harmless' statements they think are actually major red flags.

It's hard to tell if someone's your cup of tea when you don't know them that well — especially because if you've just met, they'll be on their best behavior.

But some people consider small, simple statements to be undercover red flags.

A recent Reddit thread asked, 'What is something subtle people say that is a red flag to you?' The answers prove that we can all help each other sniff out narcissists and weirdos as long as we compare notes.

1. Ah, a genius tactic.

But you're so good at it. Aka I'll compliment you in the hope that you'll take this task off my hands. - amelie_v

2. Not cool!

“Ok fine I’m sorry happy?” That’s not an apology. - Celq124

3. Okay, so who's their mom then?

“I try to be more like their friend than their mom.” - holyurushiol

4. 'It's not my fault' rarely solves the problem.

“It’s not my fault” was something a coworker used to say all the time. After a year of tardiness she told my boss it wasn’t her fault because she didn’t know how to be on time. I resented her because I have ADHD (and maybe she did too), and I took so many measures to ensure I wasn’t late for work. - iknowdanjones

5. This is some weird reverse psychology.

If they wronged you and say something like, 'I'm such a terrible person, you should leave me.' It's them trying to force sympathy on them instead of genuinely apologizing to you. They're not going to change if you stay. - AnonyMissBliss

6. Uhhh, wow.

When I started my new job the bubbliest girl who was loved by most of the staff and was also a HR manager would act like this when me and her were totally alone.

She would whisper ever so softly (to herself but to me) 'you get no thanks around here, no one cares. You just wait and watch the knives stabbing when you least expect it'. This is something she did on my first DAY!!

I said to her everyone seems lovely and accepting and she said 'well wait until you get to know them'.

This was a HR MANAGER!! - Little_Hobbitt

7. Just let people like what they like.

Asking what music you listen to, then immediately critiquing it, especially when you like main stream stuff. (I guess this applies to stuff other than music but that’s what annoys me the most) - keeper-of-calves

8. Don't start none, won't be none.

Starting an argument for no reason and then not having the capacity to resolve it. - blippityblop

9. Freedom doesn't mean lack of consequences.

Idk if this is one, but when people say things like “I can say and do whatever I want” “it’s a free country. Ever hear of freedom of speech?” in order to justify s***** things they say or do. Like sure, you have the right to speak your mind, but people also have the right to judge you for what you say. - 87319496

10. Maybe if it's 'brutal' you shouldn't be doing it?

“I’m brutally honest” or some other excuse to be an unbearable person. - mywifemademedothis

11. Yikes yikes yikes yikes.

Pretty much anytime somebody says something about themself when it's not prompted or necessary. Like 'I'm an honest person', 'I'm a hard worker', or 'I'd never hit a woman'. - jrhawk462

12. It's not nice.

When people talk s*** on their spouses. Like even in the most subtle way it’s still not appropriate small talk. If it’s my best friend and she’s telling me about a hardship or a fight, different. But when I’m meeting you for the first time I shouldn’t be able to pick up that you dislike your spouse/SO. - Unhappy_Addendum_760

13. Okay but what if your boss really is an evil sociopath?

When they disagree with someone, they default to attacking the person's character instead of their actions. We all do this from time to time, but with some people it's every time. The guy who messed up their order is 'an idiot'. Their boss is 'an evil sociopath'.

The person on Facebook who expressed a political view that opposes theirs is 'a degenerate'. That new intern at work is 'hopeless'. In the end, the final result is that anyone they disagree with for any reason is either an inherently bad person who doesn't really merit listening to. - Celestaria

14. He told on himself.

Recently had someone tell me 'I hate being accused of lying.' I'm sure we can all guess what he keeps getting caught doing... - InBtwixt

15. When did the whole 'empath' thing start?

“I’m an empath” makes me want to get in my car and drive ten hours in the opposite direction while shoving wool in my ears. My last roommate called herself an empath. Turned out to be a 30 year old emotionally abusive a** who let her dog shit in our apartment. Empath my a** - aards

90% of self-proclaimed 'empaths' I know are narcissists with a VERY dire lack of consideration for anyone's feelings but their own. - darya

16. Huge red flag!

Never asking a question. My husband realized his father never does this and now I can’t stop listening for this. - foofoofoobears