Ever since your dad walked out on you and your mom when you were six, you've aspired to never attain more than the simply adequate. You don't go chasing after the hot girl, the great job, or the best store-bought Belgian waffle and black-and-white cookie pack. You know it's only a matter of time before that waffle gives you the same disappointed stare your dad gave you just before he left. You know those black-and-white cookies will eventually think, "I am way out of this guy's league." Before you know it, all your groceries will have run off and your cupboard will be bare. This supermarket understands that you hate yourself, and it's hand-picked the most mediocre groceries just for you. The kind of groceries that are just as down on themselves as you are. The kind of groceries you know you deserve.
[ Via Reddit]