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    I wonder if Martin Luther King dreamed the first black president would be a half-white Hawaiian metrosexual.

    I wonder if Martin Luther King dreamed the first black president would be a half-white Hawaiian metrosexual

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    Let's over-celebrate MLK Day to compensate for a weekend of watching eight white quarterbacks.

    Let's over-celebrate MLK Day to compensate for a weekend of watching eight white quarterbacks

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    Happy Martin Luther King Day to a borderline racist.

    Happy Martin Luther King Day to a borderline racist

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    I have a dream that all colors and creeds will harmoniously blow off work and school on a random Monday in January.

    I have a dream that all colors and creeds will harmoniously blow off work and school on a random Monday in January

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    This MLK Day, I am volunteering to buy movie tickets.

    This MLK Day, I am volunteering to buy movie tickets

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    MLK Day is a great opportunity to feel ashamed of our white ancestors.

    MLK Day is a great opportunity to feel ashamed of our white ancestors

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    Let's love and serve our community, then get pedicures.

    Let's love and serve our community, then get pedicures

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    Today we celebrate people of all racial and ethnic backgrounds, even whites.

    Today we celebrate people of all racial and ethnic backgrounds, even whites

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    Today would be the perfect day to not wave your Confederate flag.

    Today would be the perfect day to not wave your Confederate flag

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    I think MLK would be proud that the leading GOP candidate is the least openly racist.

    I think MLK would be proud that the leading GOP candidate is the least openly racist

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    We must not judge people by the color of their skin but by their annoying personalities.

    We must not judge people by the color of their skin but by their annoying personalities

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    Everything I know about Martin Luther King is based on one verse of a U2 song.

    Everything I know about Martin Luther King is based on one verse of a U2 song

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    I plan to demonstrate nonviolence through napping.

    I plan to demonstrate nonviolence through napping

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    I find it difficult to reflect on the achievements of Martin Luther King without the aid of a preachy, overwrought Hollywood biopic.

    I find it difficult to reflect on the achievements of Martin Luther King without the aid of a preachy, overwrought Hollywood biopic

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    This MLK Day, let's celebrate the equal rights of all races to laugh at the white people running for president.

    This MLK Day, let's celebrate the equal rights of all races to laugh at the white people running for president

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    I'll be working MLK Jr. day because my state, company, and/or self is a raging bigot.

    I'll be working MLK Jr. day because my state, company, and/or self is a raging bigot.

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    I commemorate every MLK Day by watching only interracial pornography.

    I commemorate every MLK Day by watching only interracial pornography

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    Let's commemorate one of the hardest working freedom fighters in history by not working.

    Let's commemorate one of the hardest working freedom fighters in history by not working.

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