The incredible, edible actor from "Footloose." (Note: We do not know if Kevin Bacon is actually edible.)

Just like that check you really need arriving late, or a former teen starlet hitting rock bottom, Kevin Bacon becoming a spokesperson for the American Egg Board was inevitable, right? In this well-done "web film" (Bacon's words, not mine), Kevin simultaneously manages to promote eggs and help tear apart a marriage. Now that's the kind of multitasking I can support!

In the AP article about the launch of the campaign, Bob Krouse, CEO of Midwest Poultry Services, notes that "he's glad the egg board is taking a slightly edgier approach in its marketing." With that in mind, here are some other ideas for edgier, Bacon-based web films for the American Egg Board:

  • Large worms, a la Tremors, surfacing in grocery stores and decimating the entire egg section. Bacon figures out that they are feeding on eggs because "eggs are the perfect nutritionally balanced food."
  • A conservative town like in Footloose, but the reverend thinks that oatmeal is the only godly food and is afraid of the town's youth being corrupted by eating eggs.
  • Bacon tracking down a Following-style cult that cuts off people's heads, then drops a raw egg into their open throat holes because "the protein power of an egg can keep a beheaded body alive for days" while they use it for their rituals. Bacon cannot argue with this because eggs are so great, and he leaves the cult alone to keep murdering people.
Sources: The Korea Times | h/t Reddit