"You said I could have it my way. Well my way just happens to be in a quantity that could end hunger in most struggling nations. My way does not, however, involve you handing me my 30 Cinnabons with that judgey look on your face." We hope this is just the tab for a big lunch party, and not a snapshot of the explantory receipt God gives you when you arrive in heaven after suffering a coronary.

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Sources: Work.Failblog