iPhone 6 is faster and sexier than a Taiwanese race car driving pop star. (via Weibo)
Who's ready to see leaked pictures of the thing you have to buy or you'll look like an outdated douche?
Taiwanese pop star and race car driver Jimmy Lin has his hands on the the new iPhone 6 and you don't! But he leaked photos of the much better product on his Weibo site so you can see pics of him holding his brand new not-yet-released phone next to your disgustingly outdated iPhone 5 that is still on the market.
Check out that bezel my nezel. (via Weibo)
As you can see, the new iPhone is bucking Apple's smaller is better trend to go for... bigger. It is thinner and has a reduced bezel, but it is also longer and wider, just like those Samsung phones you sneer at when people don't buy Apple products.
Get the shit out the frame, ass phone! (via Weibo)
Here's the view from the front. The new iPhone 6 is so much better than your crappy iPhone 5 that it just pushes the phone right out of frame. No room for you, has been!
According to Forbes, the new iPhone has a side-mounted power button. Cheese off, top-powered iPhone 5! Go die in a fire.
You better have timed your upgrade right. If not, Tech Radar suspects you have until September 2014 to save up for this thing you need or you'll die.
In the meantime, here are some features that we hope get added in the upcoming iOS8 release.