Go bluetooth yourself!
Guess where this goes. (via)
If there's one thing about sex that kind of a bummer, it's that's there's not nearly enough data involved. I mean, sure it's fun. But you can't put fun into a spreadsheet and then turn it into a chart that allows you to monitor the amount of fun you had on a week-by-week basis over the course of a fiscal quarter. And if you can't do that, then what's the point, really?
Luckily, that's all changed! Somebody has finally figured out a way to harvest the previously wasted data from all of that sex you're having. Introducing Lovely, a wearable sex tracking device that's kind of like one of those Fitbit exercise tracker things, except waaaaaay sexier. Here's the video from its creators' IndieGogo page:
In addition to fitting snugly around the base of your member and vibrating like a good cock ring should, it also connects to your phone via bluetooth, and measures things like calories burnt, thrusts thrusted and the intensity of your sex-having.
I know what you're thinking: But I don't have a penis. Can I still use the Lovely? Absolutely. It also fits on your finger, on a dildo, on a tube of toothpaste, the neck of a soprano ukulele probably, and pretty much whatever you use to do the sex with your partner:
The crowdsourcing campaign has raised about one-fifth of its $95,000 goal after a week, so it seems like it will be coming any time now.