On April 26, orange Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump accused Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton of using her femaleness to her advantage. Quoth the Donald: "I call her 'Crooked Hillary' because she’s crooked, and you know the only thing she’s got is the woman card. That’s all she’s got, and it is pandering. It’s a weak card in her hands. In another person’s hands it could be a powerful card. I’d love to see a woman president, but she’s the wrong person."
Later that night, he echoed that line of attack, even after criticism from Clinton. "Frankly, if Hillary Clinton were a man, I don't think she'd get five percent of the vote," he said. "The only thing she's got going is the women's card. And the beautiful thing is, women don't like her. Look how well I did with women tonight."
Weirdly, some women opposed the idea that being a woman in America gave them an advantage. And so, like they do, godless liberal comedians began cracking wise on Twitter. Here are some of the best tweets from those commies.
Perks of the #womancard include getting your salary at 23% off— Orli Matlow (@HireMeImFunny) April 27, 2016
I'm tired of Hillary Clinton using the Woman Card to force the media to constantly scrutinize her appearance and undermine her judgment.— Matt Nedostup (@nedostup) April 27, 2016
I keep my woman card safely in my vagina, where only me, my doctor, and the government have access to it.— Bez (@Bez) April 27, 2016
Looks like the #womancard is the only card powerful enough to banish a Blue Eyes Trump Dragon to the Shadow Realm!— Max Dylan AshKetchem (@mynameisntdave) April 27, 2016
My #WomanCard is an all-access pass to getting blamed for enticing someone / being where I shouldn't be when I get assaulted! 👍🏽— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) April 27, 2016
is a "woman card" kind of like a business card? because here's mine pic.twitter.com/5vOM8yhSmd— priscilla page (@BBW_BFF) April 27, 2016
My woman card, when played, casts a spell of eternal darkness upon those who stand in my path— Shalyah Evans (@ShalyahEvans) April 27, 2016
.@Starbucks do you guys take the woman card or do i have to keep earning gold rewards the old way— Anne T. Donahue (@annetdonahue) April 27, 2016
But Mr. Trump what if I already played my woman card to get in the shorter bathroom line— Wokémon Master (@NotRubHarass) April 27, 2016
The woman card? It's the one with the lady on it that ranks right below the one with the guy on it.— Rhea Butcher (@RheaButcher) April 27, 2016
You're damn right I play the Woman Card, that thing was expensive as fuhhh— Siobhan Thompson (@vornietom) April 27, 2016
I change my hairstyle so often that the photo on my Woman Card never looks like me! 🙆🏻— Jen Kirkman (@JenKirkman) April 27, 2016
[Hands cashier woman card]— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) April 27, 2016
"Sorry ma'am. This is the hot woman card. It expired when you turned 25. You can apply for a MILF card at 30."
Hillary Clinton is poised to become America's first female major party presidential nominee. Classic "playing the woman card" move.— Rex Huppke (@RexHuppke) April 27, 2016
When I searched "Woman Card" on Giphy, this GIF of Kris Jenner stealing a foul ball from a child popped up. pic.twitter.com/cIcxagTiim— Parker Molloy (@ParkerMolloy) April 27, 2016
Wow. Just played the woman card at a BBQ place and got a free chicken! This is amazing.— Eugene Mirman (@EugeneMirman) April 27, 2016
My Woman Card is pink and sparkly and has a picture of Barbie holding a tampon.— Rachel Fisher (@TheRachelFisher) April 27, 2016
I thought a "Woman Card" was what North Carolina required in order to use a public restroom. #WomanCard— Lando Kardashian (@LandoKardashian) April 27, 2016
Hillary, it's the 21st century. Play the woman e-card.— Jaime Lutz (@jaime_lutz) April 27, 2016