In a truly unfair insult to the toxic-tentacled Dark Lord Cthulhu, Stephen King tweeted the latest theory on what might be the real evil forces that inhabit Donald Trump.


Cthulhu, whose presidential run has barely been covered by the mainstream media, objected to this insulting comparison.

According to the evil monster concocted by H.P. Lovecraft (via the Twitter account @cthulhu4america), Trump is too "buffoonish" to even attempt to pull off a Cthulhu-level catastrophe.

It comes as no surprise as the election reaches maximum overdrive that rank partisans seeking the upper hand would think invoking my name is a needful thing. But their misery and desperation will secure no joyland from my campaign.

You will not find me giving pneumonia to small children or being an impulsive firestarter. Those are for the lesser evils to which I should never be compared. It is the end of watch for mankind and it is our aim to bury them in the dead zone.