"It's been so long since a woman sat endlessly in this uncomfortable position while I slept."
Asia is the most densely populated region on the planet, and also the loneliest. Old people are getting older, young people are getting fewer, and more and more of them are giving up on the whole "being with other people for companionship/sex/any reason whatsoever." Technology, however, is here to save the day — to give the young the illusion of a girl/boyfriend, and to give the old the illusion that someone wants to visit them. This is especially useful because some Asian nations that rhyme with Gapan are not fans of the usual solution to an aging, lonely population — people from other countries. So instead of a Filipino nurse or Indonesian girlfriend, they've built these ingenious... solutions.
She knows how to say or sing anything, except "let's just be friends."
Everyone wants to hold their loved ones' hand. But what if the only thing you love is your iPhone?
How do you say "will be crusty soon" in Japanese?
Paro the robot seal responds to touch and keeps grandma company because you never visit.
You can be rich and refined and still fear any form of human contact.
This plant nods to your words. Just like a human who is pretending to listen to you.
Body pillows aren't just for dry-humping. If you're a gentleman, you'll marry yours.