1. Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber's Ode To Twerking Leaked Online
By the strangest of coincidences, less than a week after Miley Cyrus shocked the world with her loll-tongued twerking prowess at the MTV VMA awards, rap artists Lil Twist's new single "Twerk," featuring vocal contributions from Justin Bieber and Cyrus herself, was "leaked" online by somebody who is certainly not a publicist. The song, in which Cyrus sings, "I came up in the party time to twerk," is a meditation on twerking and the impacts that twerking can have on our lives.
Can't wait 'til every old grandma and uptight butler uses the term "twerk" in fall sitcoms.— Justin Shanes (@justinshanes) August 28, 2013
2. Johnny Manziel To Learn Valuable Lesson By Missing One Half Of One Game Against A Team Texas A&M Couldn't Lose To If They Tried
Johnny Manziel will sit out the first half of Texas A&M's first game of the season against Rice on Saturday due to what an A&M official called an "inadvertent violation" of NCAA rules concerning signing autographs. Though the backup quarterback will fill in for Manziel while he's on the bench, they could put the water boy in for all it'll matter.