1. North Korea Has Its Internet Restored, Prompting Many Citizens To Wonder, "We Have Internet?"


After a terrible nine hours without access to the many webpages glorifying Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un and his many god-like ancestors, North Korea's Internet connection was finally restored yesterday. It is currently unknown if the outage was caused by a massive DDOS, a router error or somebody picking up the phone in the other room.

2. Apple CEO Is 'Deeply Offended' By Journalists Exposing Its Factories' Poor Working Conditions

Apple CEO Tim Cook announced—through a statement with the company's senior vice president of operations Jeff Williams—that he is "deeply offended" by allegations made by British journalists that Apple's factory workers in China are subjected to the kinds of deplorable conditions that British journalists have shown Apple's factory workers in China to be subjected to.

3. Science Explains Why Airplanes Are Giant Compressed Tubes Of Flatulent Air

After watching a water bootle inflate and then deflate due to the fluctuating air pressure conditions during an airplane flight, a Danish physician discovered why airline passengers need to fart so often. Essentially, your digestive tract works much like his water bottle, and while high in the air, your bodily gases need to escape. So, it exits your bodies through your butt and into the recirculated air of the cabin. Just like it does for everybody else on your flight. Have a safe trip.