1. Washington Redskins Learn That Racist Team Names Can't Be Trademarked

The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has decided to revoke the racist trademark for the Washington Redskins due to the fact that the football team’s racist brand is "disparaging to Native Americans." The team, however, remains free to keep their racist name and logo in the absence of a trademark. They'll just have to share it with the world.

2. Emma Stone And Andrew Garfield Trick Paparazzi Into Not Being A Complete Force For Evil

Adorable celebrity couple Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield have figured out a way to make people think they're even more adorable: They've started covering their faces with the web urls of charitable organizations when being photographed by paparazzi, thus forcing the misery-spreading photographers to choose between a 7,567,345th snapshot of the couple and promoting something non-soul-crushingly awful.