1. This Is How World War III Begins — North Korea Calls Seth Rogen-James Franco Movie An 'Act Of War'

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In case you're wondering which absurd little piece of straw was going to be the one to finally break the mighty back of human civilization, the smart money seems to be on North Korea's continued indignation over the upcoming Seth Rogen-James Franco film The Interview, in which their characters attempt to assassinate Kim Jong-un. Ratcheting up from the official condemnation the country issued a few days ago, a North Korean spokesperson is now threatening retaliation if the comedy is released to theaters, saying: "Making and releasing a movie on a plot to hurt our top-level leadership is the most blatant act of terrorism and war and will absolutely not be tolerated."


2. George Lucas To Build $1 Billion Museum In Chicago Before He Eventually Rebuilds It In A Couple Years

Star Wars creator George Lucas has announced plans to build a $1 billion museum full of his personal collection of art, animation and film memorabilia in Chicago. It is assumed, based upon our prior understanding of his projects, that he will shortly thereafter begin inserting digitally rendered turd-headed monsters into the Midwest city. 

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