1. Giants Pitcher Yusmeiro Petit Throws His 76th Straight Imperfect Game
Yusmeiro Petit came precariously close to ending his flawless 76-game imperfect throwing streak yesterday when — in the ninth inning, with two outs and two strikes, without having allowed a single member of the Arizona Diamondbacks to reach base — the San Francisco Giants' pitcher successfully managed to let pinch-hitter Eric Chavez hit a a line drive to right field that landed just inches from Hunter Pence's glove. Congratulations on keeping the magic going!
2. Dennis Rodman Ends His Self-Publicity Trip To North Korea By Calling Obama And Clinton "Assholes"
On his way back from visiting his "friend for life" Kim Jong-il in scenic North Korea, a cigar-smoking, silver-sequined-cap-wearing Dennis Rodman told reporters in Beijing that negotiating the release of imprisoned American Kenneth Bae was "not [his] job," before telling them to "Ask Obama about that. Ask Hillary Clinton about that. Ask those assholes." Lots of people are talking about Rodman, so his trip is being considered a huge success.