Earlier this week, Jon Ritzheimer, the spokesperson for the militiamen who are holed up in an Oregon wildlife refuge, posted a video complaining about how there were several dildos and candy penises among the donations they received. While you might be tempted to tell the militiamen that beggars can't be choosers (and that beggars should also maybe pack some food if they're going to occupy a remote wildlife refuge), remember this: they received dildos, not lube. And what's sadder than a bunch of militiamen getting gifted dildos they can't use?
Well, don't worry, guys. Cards Against Humanity creator Max Temkin has it taken care of: he sent the militiamen 55 gallons of lube.
If the shipping date is to be believed, the militiamen might already be celebrating their new lube acquisition. Congrats, guys. This is a great day for America.