DEAD! DO YOU HEAR ME? DONE, FINISHED, CAPUT! MUERTA! SQUISHED!
This redditor's girlfriend does not mess around when it comes to spiders. As they say on the Internet: Nope!
She wants it DEAD. Not maimed, not unconscious, not relocated to a bush outside, DEAD. As in "take each of its legs and mount them on toothpicks around the roam as a warning to any and all arachnids who would think about setting up camp in one of our nooks and crannies!" DEAD. FUCKING DEAD. NOT OF THIS WORLD ANYMORE. IT SHALL CEASE TO BE. IT SHALL SHUFFLE OFF THIS MORTAL COIL. PUSHING UP THE DAISIES. PINING FOR THE FJORDS! DEAD, GOD DAMMIT! DEAD!
(by Johnny McNulty)