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Hey twelve of the most lackadaisical urinators in the world, there's a working urinal three paces to the right! Also, there are trees outside. Also, there are city streets where, sure, you might get a ticket for public urination, but it would be worth it! (Though we talk a mean talk, if we came in and saw we were three pisses away from emptying duty, we have to admit we might go for it.)

Sources: Failblog