Somebody figured out why ancient statues have tiny penises, and it's not because you're staring at them.
Easily the best part about going to any museum is heading straight for the antiquities section to scope out those tiny Ds.
A photo posted by Vasoula Georgoula (@vasoulinho) on
Like, you have to.
The fourth-century B.C. Greek statue known as the Dancing Satyr of Mazara del Vallo. SCALA / REGIONE SICILIANA, ASSESSORATO REGIONALE DEI BENI CULTURALI E DELL’IDENTITÀ SICILIANA #dancing #satyr #greekstatue
A photo posted by Get Kilted by Douglas Ferguson (@fergusondouglas) on
In case you missed it...
WTF, sculptors? You could have made these penises any size you wanted to.
Art historian Ellen Oredsson spent a not-so-small time thinking about this, and suggested a more complicated answer than just that these penises are flaccid and deserve a little encouragement.
According to Oredsson, "cultural values about male beauty were completely different back then. Today, big penises are seen as valuable and manly, but back then, most evidence points to the fact that small penises were considered better than big ones."