Is this embarrassing if a 29-year-old yells it?

Have you ever had to tell your child not to use her vulva as a pocket? Have you ever had to tell her twice?

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Then you'd probably enjoy The Pump and Dump Show, a comedy show run by moms and comedians Shayna Ferm and Tracey Tee. During the show, Shayna and Tracey encourage moms in the audience to write down the most effed up things their kids have ever done. Presumably, this makes everyone feel better that their kid isn't the kid who open mouth kissed the dog's ass (except that one lady).

Here are some of the most disturbingly funny confession cards they've collected.

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Sources: Huffington Post