Sorry Jimmy Rollins' prediction was off by a game and a team
Congratulations to the Yankees on winning as many championships this decade as the Red Sox
My first baseman sucks slightly less than yours this World Series
Let's terrify Yankees fans this Halloween by dressing up as Cliff Lee
I hope your tough, gritty, ragtag team of multi-millionaires is able to stand up to the Yankees
Best of luck finishing a marathon that doesn't involve episodes of Law & Order
Let me know if you're willing to travel a few blocks to watch people run 26.2 miles
Now that we've slept together, prepare yourself for the gentlemanly, obligatory next-day phone call
Happy birthday and Halloween to someone I assume is dressing up as someone younger
Sorry in advance for egging your home if you put anything remotely healthy in my trick-or-treat bag
I love you enough to be seen in public wearing matching Halloween costumes
Sorry my Web browser history scared you
Sorry for what I said during my blackout
Congratulations on your new baby if it was intentional
Thanks for not ditching me in a dumpster
The good news is that she was a cunt