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I'd like to wish you a happy and healthy new year by making a sound terrifying enough to give you a heart attack

Here's to another year of lunatics focusing their conspiracy theories on the Obama administration instead of on the Jews

Celebrating the Jewish New Year is like celebrating the regular New Year except we blow into a ram's horn and have the exact opposite of fun

I'd have a deeper understanding of Rosh Hashanah if even one of my Jewish friends understood what it was

Happy Holiday from a total goy

The key to weathering this rough economic climate could be the connections we make at synagogue during the High Holidays

Sorry you have to use personal days for your religion's most sacred holidays

I'm Jewish today

Have a good whatever Jewish holiday it is

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