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  • Birthday Birthday

    I'm sorry that your January birthday means you were probably conceived on April Fool's Day.

    I'm sorry that your January birthday means you were probably conceived on April Fool's Day.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    To avoid confusion, I'm waiting until tomorrow to tell you I'm pregnant.

    To avoid confusion, I'm waiting until tomorrow to tell you I'm pregnant.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I trust you not to pull any April Fool's Day pranks because I trust you'll still think it's March.

    I trust you not to pull any April Fool's Day pranks because I trust you'll still think it's March.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    Congratulations on effectively deceiving and humiliating me.

    Congratulations on effectively deceiving and humiliating me.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I'm going to have trouble taking anything you say seriously today or any other day of the year.

    I'm going to have trouble taking anything you say seriously today or any other day of the year.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I really wish I didn't have to remind you that staging a murder is not an appropriate April Fool's Day prank.

    I really wish I didn't have to remind you that staging a murder is not an appropriate April Fool's Day prank.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    Sorry I mistook your announcement of a ghastly personal tragedy for an April Fool's joke.

    Sorry I mistook your announcement of a ghastly personal tragedy for an April Fool's joke.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    if you'd have sex with me tonight I'd be perfectly fine with you telling everyone it was just an April Fool's joke.

    if you'd have sex with me tonight I'd be perfectly fine with you telling everyone it was just an April Fool's joke.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I'm sorry my April Fool's Day joke resulted in your deportation.

    I'm sorry my April Fool's Day joke resulted in your deportation.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I'm going to go ahead and assume that setting me up with your highly undatable friend was your attempt at an April Fool's joke.

    I'm going to go ahead and assume that setting me up with your highly undatable friend was your attempt at an April Fool's joke.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I intend to abuse your kind, trusting nature for the sake of my own moderate, short-lived amusement.

    I intend to abuse your kind, trusting nature for the sake of my own moderate, short-lived amusement.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    I'd wish you a happy birthday but I can't tell if Facebook is making an April Fool's joke.

    I'd wish you a happy birthday but I can't tell if Facebook is making an April Fool's joke.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    Sorry I assumed you were playing an April Fool's Day prank when you sincerely sent me a website's lame April Fool's Day prank.

    Sorry I assumed you were playing an April Fool's Day prank when you sincerely sent me a website's lame April Fool's Day prank.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    My dream for April Fool's Day is to discover your obsession with a seemingly endless series of college basketball games isn't actually real.

    My dream for April Fool's Day is to discover your obsession with a seemingly endless series of college basketball games isn't actually real.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    Let's make sure our harmless prank doesn't cause long-term psychological damage to scores of innocent civilians.

    Let's make sure our harmless prank doesn't cause long-term psychological damage to scores of innocent civilians.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    Sorry your unhealthy lifestyle makes cardiac arrest a feasible outcome from an April Fool's joke.

    Sorry your unhealthy lifestyle makes cardiac arrest a feasible outcome from an April Fool's joke.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    May your workday not be as tedious as a multi-billion dollar company's April Fool's Day prank.

    May your workday not be as tedious as a multi-billion dollar company's April Fool's Day prank.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    Being unemployed affords me plenty of time to devise treacherous April Fool's pranks on the people who made me unemployed.

    Being unemployed affords me plenty of time to devise treacherous April Fool's pranks on the people who made me unemployed.

  • Tax Day Tax Day

    Doing your taxes on April Fool's Day seems like a perfectly legitimate way to defraud the government.

    Doing your taxes on April Fool's Day seems like a perfectly legitimate way to defraud the government.

  • April Fool's Day April Fool's Day

    This is the one day of the year I wish I was on jury duty.

    This is the one day of the year I wish I was on jury duty.

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