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  • Friendship Friendship

    Sorry I brought cheap beer to your party, then drank all your expensive beer.

    Sorry I brought cheap beer to your party, then drank all your expensive beer.

  • Passover Passover

    Just wanted to offer my services in helping you rid your home of beer before Passover.

    Just wanted to offer my services in helping you rid your home of beer before Passover.

  • Somewhat Topical Somewhat Topical

    If you're still undecided in Nevada, just think about which candidate you'd like to have a beer and legally solicit a prostitute with.

    If you're still undecided in Nevada, just think about which candidate you'd like to have a beer and legally solicit a prostitute with.

  • Drinking Drinking

    I don't need the threat of an impending natural disaster to stock up on liquor.

    I don't need the threat of an impending natural disaster to stock up on liquor.

  • Bud Light Huddle Bud Light Huddle

    Looking forward to spending lots of quality time with you on Sundays once my team is mathematically eliminated from the playoffs.

    Looking forward to spending lots of quality time with you on Sundays once my team is mathematically eliminated from the playoffs.

  • Drinking Drinking

    I've finally sworn off swearing off alcohol.

    I've finally sworn off swearing off alcohol.

  • Father's Day Father's Day

    Dad, thanks for giving me my first beer and paying for my first rehab.

    Dad, thanks for giving me my first beer and paying for my first rehab.

  • Chili's Happy.. Chili's Happy..

    Let's relive our college days by drinking beers on a weekday.

    Let's relive our college days by drinking beers on a weekday.

  • Drinking Drinking

    I'd love to meet you for coffee if I wasn't someone who needed alcohol to socialize.

    I'd love to meet you for coffee if I wasn't someone who needed alcohol to socialize.

  • St. Patrick's.. St. Patrick's..

    I wish drinking green beer on St. Patrick's Day wasn't the closest you'll come this year to eating a vegetable.

    I wish drinking green beer on St. Patrick's Day wasn't the closest you'll come this year to eating a vegetable.

  • Drinking Drinking

    Let's drink to alcohol.

    Let's drink to alcohol.

  • Bud Light Huddle Bud Light Huddle

    You're a great friend with horrible taste in sports teams.

    You're a great friend with horrible taste in sports teams.

  • Boss's Day Boss's Day

    Let’s celebrate Boss's Day by getting you as drunk as someone with far fewer responsibilities.

    Let’s celebrate Boss's Day by getting you as drunk as someone with far fewer responsibilities.

  • Earth Day Earth Day

    Tonight I'm going to recycle my beer bottles instead of throwing them out the car window.

    Tonight I'm going to recycle my beer bottles instead of throwing them out the car window.

  • Family Family

    Family Beer and Liquor.

    Family Beer and Liquor.

  • Birthday Birthday

    21st Birthday: Happy birthday to someone now old enough to be asked by younger people to buy beer.

    21st Birthday: Happy birthday to someone now old enough to be asked by younger people to buy beer.

  • Bud Light Huddle Bud Light Huddle

    Your poor performance in fantasy sports is impressive for its consistency.

    Your poor performance in fantasy sports is impressive for its consistency.

  • Better Like.. Better Like..

    Better Like Button: Are you drunk?

    Better Like Button: Are you drunk?

  • Birthday Birthday

    You'll never be too old to buy booze for underage kids.

    You'll never be too old to buy booze for underage kids.

  • Redneck Island Redneck Island

    I wouldn't mind being stuck on a deserted island with you and an enormous amount of beer.

    I wouldn't mind being stuck on a deserted island with you and an enormous amount of beer.

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