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  • Weekend Weekend

    I'm not nearly as afraid of Friday the 13th as I am of people who are afraid of Friday the 13th.

    I'm not nearly as afraid of Friday the 13th as I am of people who are afraid of Friday the 13th.

  • Workplace Workplace

    I consider any Friday I'm at my office an unlucky Friday.

    I consider any Friday I'm at my office an unlucky Friday.

  • Weekend Weekend

    May your Friday the 13th be filled with naive, horny, pot-smoking teenagers and not a machete-wielding mass murderer.

    May your Friday the 13th be filled with naive, horny, pot-smoking teenagers and not a machete-wielding mass murderer.

  • Sports Sports

    Watching Jason Voorhees kill people in a hockey mask is the most I've ever been interested in hockey.

    Watching Jason Voorhees kill people in a hockey mask is the most I've ever been interested in hockey.

  • Confession Confession

    Getting murdered in the woods on Friday the 13th wouldn't even be my least favorite thing about going camping.

    Getting murdered in the woods on Friday the 13th wouldn't even be my least favorite thing about going camping.

  • Workplace Workplace

    I'd dread Friday the 13th much more if it was on a Monday.

    I'd dread Friday the 13th much more if it was on a Monday.

  • Confession Confession

    I've overcome my fear of Friday the 13th since I don't think my luck can conceivably get any worse.

    I've overcome my fear of Friday the 13th since I don't think my luck can conceivably get any worse.

  • Flirting Flirting

    Hope you get lucky this Friday the 13th.

    Hope you get lucky this Friday the 13th.

  • Weekend Weekend

    I'm superstitious about not getting drunk on a Friday.

    I'm superstitious about not getting drunk on a Friday.

  • Thinking Of You Thinking Of You

    Happy Friday the 13th to my favorite non-murderous Jason.

    Happy Friday the 13th to my favorite non-murderous Jason.

  • Birthday Birthday

    I hope your irrational fear of Friday the 13th helps alleviate your rational fear of getting older.

    I hope your irrational fear of Friday the 13th helps alleviate your rational fear of getting older.

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