• refine by:
sort-by: Most Popular | Newest
  • Birthday Birthday

    Happy birthday to someone old enough to remember what it was like to poop without a smartphone.

    Happy birthday to someone old enough to remember what it was like to poop without a smartphone.

  • Birthday Birthday

    Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.

    Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.

  • Birthday Birthday

    Happy birthday to someone I hope is my friend even when we're too senile to remember each other's birthdays.

    Happy birthday to someone I hope is my friend even when we're too senile to remember each other's birthdays.

  • Easter Easter

    Let's take a break from debating gay marriage to remember an unmarried 33-year-old man who hung out with 12 dudes.

    Let's take a break from debating gay marriage to remember an unmarried 33-year-old man who hung out with 12 dudes.

  • Breakup Breakup

    Sometimes I stalk you online to remember why I don't want you anymore.

    Sometimes I stalk you online to remember why I don't want you anymore.

  • Friendship Friendship

    If you're ever worried about what people think of you, remember they probably don't think of you at all.

    If you're ever worried about what people think of you, remember they probably don't think of you at all.

  • Friendship Friendship

    We've been friends so long I can no longer remember why we're friends at all.

    We've been friends so long I can no longer remember why we're friends at all.

  • Cry for Help Cry for Help

    By the time you get this card, I won't remember sending it.

    By the time you get this card, I won't remember sending it.

  • Yom Kippur Yom Kippur

    Don't hesitate to contact me if you can't remember the things you should be atoning for.

    Don't hesitate to contact me if you can't remember the things you should be atoning for.

  • Missing You Missing You

    I barely remember what I don't like about you.

    I barely remember what I don't like about you.

  • PSAs PSAs

    PSA: Before getting behind the wheel, remember: this is what people who get a DUI look like going to work.

    PSA: Before getting behind the wheel, remember: this is what people who get a DUI look like going to work.

  • Anniversary Anniversary

    Today marks the first anniversary of me remembering when your anniversary is.

    Today marks the first anniversary of me remembering when your anniversary is.

  • St. Patrick's.. St. Patrick's..

    Let's remember to make out before we vomit.

    Let's remember to make out before we vomit.

  • Somewhat Topical Somewhat Topical

    Remember not to let your Web site crash the day after it's valued at $100 billion.

    Remember not to let your Web site crash the day after it's valued at $100 billion.

  • Earth Day Earth Day

    This Earth Day, let's remember the importance of protecting every part of the planet except Florida.

    This Earth Day, let's remember the importance of protecting every part of the planet except Florida.

  • Invention of.. Invention of..

    I'm as handsome, fit, and fashionable as you may remember so let me know if you've lowered your standards.

    I'm as handsome, fit, and fashionable as you may remember so let me know if you've lowered your standards.

  • Workplace Workplace

    When work feels overwhelming, remember that you're going to die.

    When work feels overwhelming, remember that you're going to die.

  • Mardi Gras Mardi Gras

    Thinking today of all the good times we had together at Mardi Gras but can't remember anything.

    Thinking today of all the good times we had together at Mardi Gras but can't remember anything.

  • Weekend Weekend

    I'm excited for the plans I made this weekend that I'm going to break once I remember I don't like having plans.

    I'm excited for the plans I made this weekend that I'm going to break once I remember I don't like having plans.

  • Seasonal Seasonal

    Just wondering how many of you remember I won't be doing shit all summer.

    Just wondering how many of you remember I won't be doing shit all summer.

DON'T MISS THIS