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  • Flirting Flirting

    You’d think twice about checking out my ass while I’m walking into the women’s room if you knew what I was about to do in there.

    You’d think twice about checking out my ass while I’m walking into the women’s room if you knew what I was about to do in there.

  • Confession Confession

    I've left work due to shitting my pants.

    I've left work due to shitting my pants.

  • Thanksgiving Thanksgiving

    Allow me to apologize in advance for what I will do to your bathroom on Thanksgiving.

    Allow me to apologize in advance for what I will do to your bathroom on Thanksgiving.

  • Earth Day Earth Day

    I'm helping improve the environment by shitting outdoors.

    I'm helping improve the environment by shitting outdoors.

  • Confession Confession

    I would rather be sitting on a toilet with no toilet paper than with no cell phone.

    I would rather be sitting on a toilet with no toilet paper than with no cell phone.

  • Encouragement Encouragement

    Good luck not hitting the wall and shitting your pants in public.

    Good luck not hitting the wall and shitting your pants in public.

  • Weekend Weekend

    Let's confirm that we're getting pants-shitting drunk tonight.

    Let's confirm that we're getting pants-shitting drunk tonight.

  • Pregnancy Pregnancy

    You're crapping for two now.

    You're crapping for two now.

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