• Thinking of You Thinking of You

    I'm sorry you're having a bad hair life.

    I'm sorry you're having a bad hair life.

  • Flirting Flirting

    Your sexy Movember facial hair makes me want to give you a testicular exam.

    Your sexy Movember facial hair makes me want to give you a testicular exam.

  • The Goldbergs The Goldbergs

    There's absolutely nothing wrong with big hair.

    There's absolutely nothing wrong with big hair.

  • Seasonal Seasonal

    Sorry this heat wave is making you look like Nick Nolte's mugshot.

    Sorry this heat wave is making you look like Nick Nolte's mugshot.

  • Seasonal Seasonal

    Summer Badge: This is to honor you for generously removing your back hair in time for beach season.

    Summer Badge: This is to honor you for generously removing your back hair in time for beach season.

  • Encouragement Encouragement

    May your facial hair get the attention you believe it deserves.

    May your facial hair get the attention you believe it deserves.

  • Pets Pets

    I can always count on my dog to make me feel better about a bad hair day.

    I can always count on my dog to make me feel better about a bad hair day.

  • Halloween Halloween

    This Halloween, may your Donald Trump wig look just as unrealistic as Donald Trump's.

    This Halloween, may your Donald Trump wig look just as unrealistic as Donald Trump's.

  • GCB GCB

    Just remember that the higher the hair, the closer to heaven.

    Just remember that the higher the hair, the closer to heaven.

  • Somewhat Topical Somewhat Topical

    In lieu of putting up with your unkempt facial hair for an extended period of time, let's just make a charitable donation.

    In lieu of putting up with your unkempt facial hair for an extended period of time, let's just make a charitable donation.

  • Seasonal Seasonal

    Movember is my favorite time of year for unironic facial hair.

    Movember is my favorite time of year for unironic facial hair.

  • Somewhat Topical Somewhat Topical

    I miss the days when Supreme Court confirmation hearings revolved around pubic hair.

    I miss the days when Supreme Court confirmation hearings revolved around pubic hair.

  • Sports Sports

    I think A-Rod finally set a good example by taking the highlights out of his hair.

    I think A-Rod finally set a good example by taking the highlights out of his hair.

  • Drinking Drinking

    Thanks for always holding my hair back when I vomit.

    Thanks for always holding my hair back when I vomit.

  • Flirting Flirting

    Let me know your preference in pubic hair shapes.

    Let me know your preference in pubic hair shapes.

  • Congratulations Congratulations

    Congratulations on still having most of your hair.

    Congratulations on still having most of your hair.

  • Friendship Friendship

    I wish I had your hair.

    I wish I had your hair.

  • Breakup Breakup

    If you cut your hair, I'm dumping you.

    If you cut your hair, I'm dumping you.

  • Sympathy Sympathy

    Everyone has bad hair days.

    Everyone has bad hair days.

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