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    By next Teacher Appreciation Week may you be paid as much as a garbage collector.

    By next Teacher Appreciation Week may you be paid as much as a garbage collector.

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    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to someone I hope never gets fully replaced by Wikipedia.

    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to someone I hope never gets fully replaced by Wikipedia.

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    I hope your Teacher Appreciation Week isn't spoiled by the record-breaking success of a movie based on comic books.

    I hope your Teacher Appreciation Week isn't spoiled by the record-breaking success of a movie based on comic books.

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    Thanks to my teachers for making classes as boring as possible to prepare me for business meetings and presentations.

    Thanks to my teachers for making classes as boring as possible to prepare me for business meetings and presentations.

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    I hope your high school students appreciate you to the extent the law allows.

    I hope your high school students appreciate you to the extent the law allows

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    Sorry being a teacher means you have to deal with students who are even more obnoxious than you were.

    Sorry being a teacher means you have to deal with students who are even more obnoxious than you were.

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    Sorry your students drive nicer cars than you.

    Sorry your students drive nicer cars than you

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    Thanks for preparing me for amounting to nothing by constantly telling me I would amount to nothing.

    Thanks for preparing me for amounting to nothing by constantly telling me I would amount to nothing

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    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to someone who taught me the best lesson of all is to not become a teacher.

    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to someone who taught me the best lesson of all is to not become a teacher.

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    May your contempt for your students always remain relatively subdued.

    May your contempt for your students always remain relatively subdued

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    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to someone who works incredibly hard until 3 p.m. nine months a year.

    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to someone who works incredibly hard until 3 p.m. nine months a year

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    Thanks for not being one of those weird teachers who marries a former student.

    Thanks for not being one of those weird teachers who marries a former student.

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    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to my second favorite teacher behind Walter White.

    Happy Teacher Appreciation Week to my second favorite teacher behind Walter White.

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    Thanks to the teachers who instilled in me such a love of English that I'm perpetually mortified when reading the Internet.

    Thanks to the teachers who instilled in me such a love of English that I'm perpetually mortified when reading the Internet.

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