Cosmopolitan:

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You mistakenly think you're fun and flirty but are actually completely out of touch enough to say things like "I wouldn't call myself a feminist, I just think women should be equal to men!"

Scotch on the rocks:

Still angry about that college professor who hit on you when you took his class, you like to dabble in occasional misandry just for fun. Your favorite t-shirt reads: "I dare you to tell me to smile"

Water:

You're aware that identifying as a female is not the only struggle one person might have and your brand of intersectional-inclusive-trigger-warned-fifth-wave feminism means that you would never partake in a beverage that all humans were not able to equally enjoy, but you are willing to split dessert if anyone else was thinking about that.

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