•  

    I love every part of you which can make me orgasm.

    I love every part of you which can make me orgasm.

  •  

    There's nobody I'd rather spend the rest of my life trying to change into someone else than you.

    There's nobody I'd rather spend the rest of my life trying to change into someone else than you.

  •  

    I'd rather pray for you than actually exert myself physically helping you.

    I'd rather pray for you than actually exert myself physically helping you.

  •  

    When we're together I'd rather you stared at my boobs than your phone.

    When we're together I'd rather you stared at my boobs than your phone.

  •  

    The GOP settling for Romney is a great reminder to thank you for settling for me.

    The GOP settling for Romney is a great reminder to thank you for settling for me

  •  

    Kudos for breaking the stereotype about terrible Asian drivers by not being Asian.

    Kudos for breaking the stereotype about terrible Asian drivers by not being Asian.

  •  

    I don't believe anything I read on Facebook, including my own status updates.

    I don't believe anything I read on Facebook, including my own status updates.

  •  

    You are the automatic pop up ad of my existence.

    You are the automatic pop up ad of my existence.

  •  

    Let's take this relationship back online.

    Let's take this relationship back online

  •  

    Getting a man to deactivate his dating profile is the new marriage.

    Getting a man to deactivate his dating profile is the new marriage

  •  

    I don't know what I would do without you, but I bet it's awesome.

    I don't know what I would do without you, but I bet it's awesome.

  •  

    I think the next logical step in our relationship is speaking.

    I think the next logical step in our relationship is speaking.

  •  

    You remind me of an ugly version of Steve Buscemi.

    You remind me of an ugly version of Steve Buscemi.

  •  

    Nothing that Facebook changes will ever keep me from stalking you.

    Nothing that Facebook changes will ever keep me from stalking you.

  •  

    I want you to know that I meant every word of the compliments you forced me to make.

    I want you to know that I meant every word of the compliments you forced me to make.

  •  

    I'd punch anyone who shoves a pie in your face during a Parliamentary hearing even if you deserve it.

    I'd punch anyone who shoves a pie in your face during a Parliamentary hearing even if you deserve it

  •  

    Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.

    Just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now.

  •  

    I think we should start sexting other people.

    I think we should start sexting other people.

  •  

    I assume you never called because you're worried about cell phone radiation.

    I assume you never called because you're worried about cell phone radiation

  •  

    Bragging is my greatest accomplishment.

    Bragging is my greatest accomplishment

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