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encouragement

As a show of support while you study for the bar exam, I'll barely mention my many leisure activities
I hope you pass the bar exam and get me probation for my eventual DUIs
Hopefully two miserable days of taking the bar exam results in several torturous decades of being overworked
Let's celebrate finishing the bar exam by doing things that could get us disbarred
Good luck passing the bar exam and my deepest early condolences if you don't
If you put your mind to it, you can achieve anything outside of the entertainment industry
You do really well with chicks for one of my uglier friends
I hope you become famous enough to not bother returning my calls
I've come to admire your complete disinterest in being fashionable
Glad you've started to recognize your raging, long-term, absurdly obvious alcoholism
Good luck not hitting the wall and shitting your pants in public
Your new haircut looks great and exactly the same to me
Carpe diem before the glaciers drown us
I hear yoga does amazing things for people who incessantly glorify yoga
You're surprisingly well-educated for an American
I've come up with some great ideas on how to make you a better person
I could totally see you getting into gum or mints
That outfit would go great with a personality
You've gotten much better at lying
You're going to make some lucky feline very happy someday
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