Birthday User Cardsshowing 1 - 20 of 8,356
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  • If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.

    If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.

    pbalmuth09/16/2009
    53 sends
    4.43 (203 votes)
  • May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.

    May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.

    mjonharr 02/23/2011
    47 sends
    4.44 (96 votes)
  • Have a joyous time celebrating the day your face rubbed your mother's vagina.

    Have a joyous time celebrating the day your face rubbed your mother's vagina.

    Adam128985303/23/2012
    41 sends
    4.40 (57 votes)
  • At least you're not as old as you will be next year.

    At least you're not as old as you will be next year.

    emjay14401/06/2011
    25 sends
    4.08 (40 votes)
  • I hope you receive the same attention as you demanded on the day of your birth.

    I hope you receive the same attention as you demanded on the day of your birth.

    jefmj10/03/2011
    24 sends
    4.22 (18 votes)
  • Happy Anniversary of Your 29th Birthday.

    Happy Anniversary of Your 29th Birthday.

    daynasuzanne07/01/2011
    19 sends
    3.57 (35 votes)
  • Happy Birthday to someone I would donate some non-essential organs.

    Happy Birthday to someone I would donate some non-essential organs.

    yeawhatever09/27/2009
    16 sends
    3.40 (60 votes)
  • I find it strange that we celebrate you on the anniversary of a day when your mom did all of the work.

    I find it strange that we celebrate you on the anniversary of a day when your mom did all of the work.

    paulsalazarjr02/23/2010
    10 sends
    4.39 (70 votes)
  • Sorry I care so much about your birthday that it's making you uncomfortable.

    Sorry I care so much about your birthday that it's making you uncomfortable.

    mjonharr 11/16/2010
    7 sends
    4.58 (19 votes)
  • Happy Birthday to a friend I will probably wind up living with after our husbands finally come out of the closet.

    Happy Birthday to a friend I will probably wind up living with after our husbands finally come out of the closet.

    jamieann11/15/2010
    6 sends
    4.29 (35 votes)
  • Age is just a number that determines how happy, attractive, and able-bodied you are.

    Age is just a number that determines how happy, attractive, and able-bodied you are.

    jumbie004902/27/2012
    6 sends
    4.24 (29 votes)
  • Happy Birthday from your only friend other than alcohol.

    Happy Birthday from your only friend other than alcohol.

    laura_mae0310/13/2011
    5 sends
    4.44 (16 votes)
  • Amazing to think that you were once a helpless little baby, but now you are a giant helpless man.

    Amazing to think that you were once a helpless little baby, but now you are a giant helpless man.

    Kostas111/19/2011
    5 sends
    4.83 (36 votes)
  • I hope you celebrate your birthday appropriately: with lots of booze and bad decisions.

    I hope you celebrate your birthday appropriately: with lots of booze and bad decisions.

    lizewhiteyesterday
    4 sends
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • May you live long enough to dread having birthdays.

    May you live long enough to dread having birthdays.

    mjonharr 10/01/2010
    4 sends
    2.80 (5 votes)
  • This birthday greeting has been brought to you by my fake sense of obligation and fear of being shunned by the rest of the office.

    This birthday greeting has been brought to you by my fake sense of obligation and fear of being shunned by the rest of the office.

    timpysan01/19/2012
    3 sends
    4.50 (10 votes)
  • Happy Birthday Bitch, I poisened your drink.

    Happy Birthday Bitch, I poisened your drink.

    Katharin137128704/10/2012
    3 sends
    4.50 (2 votes)
  • I hope your birthday's as good as bacon on...well, everything. Happy Birthday!

    I hope your birthday's as good as bacon on...well, everything. Happy Birthday!

    April149036205/04/2012
    3 sends
    4.00 (2 votes)
  • Why do people say 'She wants to have her cake and eat it too'? What the fuck else are you supposed to do with cake?

    Why do people say "She wants to have her cake and eat it too"? What the fuck else are you supposed to do with cake?

    socalchick05/19/2012
    3 sends
    5.00 (1 votes)
  • Dear Lord , Please forgive me... For it's my birthday and i'm gonna drink and sin like a mother fucker.

    Dear Lord , Please forgive me... For it's my birthday and i'm gonna drink and sin like a mother fucker.

    cardsImade10 hours ago
    2 sends
    0.00 (0 votes)

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